The online community of knife collectors, A Knife Family Forged in Steel
Tags:
Retirement Planning
If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock a couple of years ago, it would now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
If you had purchased $1000 of Delta Air Lines stock you would have $49.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer/wine one year ago, drank all the beer/wine, then turned in the cans/bottlesfor the recycling REFUND, you would have had $214.00.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.
Now THAT is a plan!!!!!!!!!!!!
Craig Henry said:
Retirement Planning
If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock a couple of years ago, it would now be worth $49.00.
With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1000.00.
With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left.
If you had purchased $1000 of Delta Air Lines stock you would have $49.00 left.
But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer/wine one year ago, drank all the beer/wine, then turned in the cans/bottlesfor the recycling REFUND, you would have had $214.00.
Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.
Those are funny, Craig.
Differences Between men and Women;
NICKNAMES · If Sheila, Candy and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Sheila, Candy and Sarah. · If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba and Wildman .
EATING OUT · When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.. · When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.
MONEY · A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. · A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
BATHROOMS · A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. · The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
ARGUMENTS · A woman has the last word in any argument. · Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
FUTURE · A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. · A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
MARRIAGE · A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. · A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
DRESSING UP · A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. · A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
NATURAL · Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.. · Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
OFFSPRING · Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. · A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
THOUGHT FOR THE DAY A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
© 2024 Created by Jan Carter. Powered by