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BEST POEM I N THE WORLD
I was shocked, confused, bewildered
As I entered Heaven' s door,
Not by the beauty of it all,
Nor the lights or its decor.
But it was the folks in Heaven
Who made me sputter and gasp
The thieves, the liars, the sinners,
The alcoholics and the trash.
There stood the kid from seventh grade
Who swiped my lunch money twice.
Next to him was my old neighbor
Who never said anything nice.
Bob, who I always thought
Was rotting away in hell,
Was sitting pretty on cloud nine,
Looking incredibly well.
I nudged Jesus, ' What's the deal?
I would love to hear Your take.
How'd all these sinners get up here?
God must've made a mistake.
' And why is everyone so quiet ,
So somber - give me a clue.'
' Hush, child,' He said,
' they're all in shock.
No one thought they'd be seeing you.'
Ouch!
That guy in the poem must be me!
Good one, Charles!
Or me!
Nope, it's me! LOL!
LMAO! That sounds about right.
LOL!!
Here's one for all you pilots out there...
A 65 year old man went to the flight surgeon for for his Class II Flight exam and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in.
The doctor asked, "To what do you attribute your good health?"
The old timer said, "I'm a pilot and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight, climb all over the aircraft doing my pre-flight inspection, fly all day, etc."
The doctor said, "Well, I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. Genes have a lot to do with health, how old was your dad when he died?"
The old timer said, "Who said my dad's dead?"
The doctor said, "You mean you're 65 years old and your dad's still alive? How old is he?"
The old timer said, "He's only 84 yrs old and, in fact, he built and flies his own airplane! He went flying with me this morning. That's why he's still alive... he's a pilot too!"
The doctor said, "Well, that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?"
The old timer said, "Who said my grandpa's dead?"
The doctor said, "You mean your dad is 84 years old and his father is still living?! How old is he?"
The old timer said, "Grandpa is 102 years old and he was a pilot too."
The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, "I guess he went flying with you this morning too?"
The old timer said, "No...Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he just got married and he's on his honeymoon."
The doctor said in amazement, "Got married?!! Why would a 102-year-old guy want to get married?"
The old timer said, "Who said he wanted to?"
LOL!!
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